if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
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