Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
i just entered cocaine into my calorie counter.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
I'm taking pictures of my asshole to send to my boss. This is not what I had in mind the day after thanksgiving.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
