just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
You smell like stripper and shame
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
What does it say about my expectations if I'm pounding three beers the hour before a date?
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
Randomize