we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Randomize
