I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
