butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
It's like trying to pry an octopus off you. Except the octopus speaks English and can get drunk.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You insisted we put glow sticks on you so that we didn't lose you if you went pee in the dark.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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