how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Just because your gf gives mediocre bjs doesn't mean I can fill that void
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
