She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Randomize
