I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Randomize
