a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
soo... how was my night?
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
