...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
Randomize
