I smell stomach acid.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
