Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
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