people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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