Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize
