Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
