yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
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