I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
What part of i'm handcuffed to an oven do you not understand?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
