Who is this?
Who do you want it to be?
Sarah Palin
I've got the updo, bangs, and glasses, but I'm blonde
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Randomize
