I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Randomize
