I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize
