problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Randomize
