dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize