I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
Randomize
