one might say we're banned from that church
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
I gave the bathroom attendant $5 last night for turning the sink on for me. What. The. Fuck.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
