I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize