So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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