WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Horrible. I told her my girlfriend is in the hospital and she tried to give me a lapdance.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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