you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
