I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
Randomize
