Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
