it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
