I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Randomize
