chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
