Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Randomize
