so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
