If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
i just checked to make sure valentines day this year was on a weekend assuming ill want to be drunk all day
hearing about your life makes me feel so good about mine
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
