I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
So shortly after drunk sex...she starts crying and saying..." you don't care about me, you never do anything nice for me" so I called her a cab
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
My butt remains clenched, sir.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize