I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
I was on antibiotics for a bladder infection and couldn't drink and you told me there was no longer room in your life for me.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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