Heybabeimwearingurpanties
I don't know where I am but the food in the fridge is awesome.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
My vagina just recognized that song.
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
