last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
You go to school with some of the ugliest girls I've ever seen... How are you not getting laid?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize