Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
