if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
When you wake up, I have rum and am in town
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
