You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Randomize
