she looked like the before picture.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
Randomize
