I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
