Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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