Cold hands, warm shart.
I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I gave his parents a candle as a thanks for letting me hang out there all the time. Which i guess is more accurately a thanks-for-letting-me-fuck-your-son candle
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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