are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Randomize
