If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
you threw up in the bushes next to the ABC store and kept saying "you're home, blueberry vodka, you're home!"
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I donkey kicked that mother fucker. Never stood a chance.
It was a door. A completely inanimate object, of course it didn't stand a chance you idiot.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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