Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
You called him your tasty little crouton. Which actually wasn't the weirdest part.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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